JAQSLEX – Water Fetcher Extraordinaire

I guess I’d rather see Jack spelled like this than those other great alternates like Jaxson and Mykul. But I’m hoping Jacques was just trying to respect the seven character rule here. If you think about it, license plates are like a super-short Twitter, really. So Jake is ready to Tweet!

OK, so where do you think you’d find such a LEX? Is it an SUV? Yes! Is it a Hybrid? No! Is it shiny? Yes! That means OC baby!

And what does the OC mean? It meanz myOChomie!

myOChomie say "what do Gille drive?"

MB4LILY – Inaugural Rebirth!

Yes, yes, my loyal and ardent fans have almost given up on me, their uber-blogger. But I’m back! And I’m back, thanks to a guy down in the OC who’s proving to me that the OC makes LA look like chump change – at least in regards to the only metric that counts: B4B playtz!

So, Lily, you get picked on for more than just your gleaming, massive, BP-sucking road macheen. No, not your cash-cred Fletcher Jones, or even the fact that this is no lowly Vegas FJ outlet, but the Newport bastion of status. It’s just that, as unluck would have it, a pic of your self-and-car obsession landed in my inbox this morning under the title “Flower Power” and, well, the temptation was to great, because the contrast was too distinct between the 60s ideal and your 2010 reality.

You can probably cling to a little Janis Joplin here to explain your actions, but really, when did anyone really take her seriously?

Let’s all just hope that this whole deal was a guilt payment from your married, bald boyfriend, OK?



GEOS JAG – Shiny, Happy, Jaguar!

Judge Advocate General? Is that you? OHHHHHH, you’re just pointing out that the shiny, bling car you’re driving in a Jaguar – as in, a Jag-u-ar, right?

OK, George, I’m curious (nice?), where did you find that 49 cent license plate frame? Was that free with a premium, full-service fill-up? Classy!

Power to "Earth Man"

Power to "Earth Man"

CLS4MEE – Like Nice Clean Teeth

Hmm. Definitely a tough nut to crack here.

Giddy like a three-year-old, as in “candy for MEEEEE!”

Or some great accidental initials like KGB or MRI.

Well, the mystery will remain unsolved. But this baby does sparkle!

And, ah, no need to point out the MBness of this all – straight to the bling model, baby.

Those in the know, know the CLS

Those in the know, know the CLS


Sent in by a friend (who appears to be driving an iPhone), who was duly impressed that B has two Bs. At least. Maybe more by now even!

How cool is it that your name begins with the same first initial as the best car on the planet? Wow!

Hey  – wait a minute here! BOZO begins with “B” too. So I could do this also. Rock on!

OMG! I could even do this with a Beemer and a Benzoid! Heavenly!

Nothing like being multi-Benzoided

Nothing like being multi-Benzoided

KS GT – or K’s GT

OK, K, so you did a little artwork there, huh? Classy! Too bad you can’t just “buy an apostrophe” from the DMV, right?

Now is this a Shelby GT or a Mustang? Kinda looks like a ‘stang (just re-used your apostrophe thing!) but, then again, it seems to say S H E L B Y in there somewhere.

Oh – and I totally groove on the palm tree license plate from. Very equatorial!




LZR BIMR – Now we’re talkin’!

Elizabeth, is it? Eliza, perhaps?

You’ve fallen into the trap. Sorry.

Been looking for BIMRs for a while now, but all I seem to find are BNZs and some PTs sprinkled in. But I knew that the egotistic BIMR driver had to be out there somwhere. And then I found you, LZR.

You probably thought that the rhythmic sound of LZR BIMR would somehow obscure that fact that you couldn’t be prouder of your BIMR. Guess what? Conspicuous consumption is history, dear.


Black Frame Says "I'm cool - no need to thirdisize my BIMRness"

Black, generic frame says "I'm cool - no need to thirdisize my BIMRness"

CA 4STR – You Know You’re a STaR Baby!

When you’re a rock star, you get to party hard. Champagne and caviar. Tricked out, exotic car.

Or so it has been said.

Living the high life (more like the Hi-Life) cruisin in the Caddy in Ojai. Yeah, that didn’t last now, STR, did it? More like you’re driving a banged-up old piece of crap now. But, hey, good thing you blew some of that money from the good times on that plate, huh? Smart.


Roosevelt Never Had it Better

Roosevelt Never Had it Better


Wow – this one was a nailbiter. I was with the family walking around, I think, Paso Robles. Nice old town square, central California wine country, rife with the vacationing older couple set. To be expected, for sure. But how classic was it to find Samy (Sammy?) and his wife strolling back to their SL. And, how do I slyly take a photo without explaining to this nice couple that I find them totally lame? Such is my predicament.

I will say that I was good and sly about it – so much so that my son noticed the plate a minute after the deed was done and sealed in my cell phone camera, and he was going nuts trying to get me to get a pic as the happy couple backed out in their throaty coupe.

So am I too much of a wimp to confront these losers? Next time I’ll try to chat them up, Ali-G-Style.


You didn't get away!

You didn't get away!